Beer Ad in Soccer/Football

Bad Day in the field!

Another interesting story...

This guy lost his gf in a train accident, but the gal name nowhere
appeared in the dead contact list.
This guy grew up n became IT technical architect in his late 20's ,
achievemnt in itself!!.
He hired devloper from the whole globe and plan to make a platform
where he could search for his gf.
Things went as planned n he found her ,after losing millions of dollar
and 3 long years.


It was time to shut down the search operation , when CEO of google had
a word with this guy n take over this application,

This Software made a whopping 1 billion dolar profit in its first year,
which we today know as ORKUT.


Moral of the story?
Lose ur GF and make Billions....... _,_._,___

Why Men are Happier!

Men Are Just Happier People-What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care
of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You
can never be pregnant.

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a
water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You
never have to drive to another gas station rest-room because this one is
just too icky.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same
work, more pay.Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux
rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't
cut, blister, or! mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone
conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. ! You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own
jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If
someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more
than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable
to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original
colour. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to
shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. Your belly
usually hides your big hips.

One wallet and one pair of shoes one colour for all seasons. You can wear
shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket
knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache. You can
do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes. No
wonder men are happier.

How to Treat a Rude Customer…

An award should go to the gate attendant at Luqa airport. A crowded Malta-London flight was cancelled. She was the lone attendant in charge of re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his way to the desk. He slapped his ticket down on the counter and said, "I HAVE to be on this flight and it HAS to be FIRST CLASS".
The attendant replied, "I'm sorry sir. I'll be happy to try to help you, but I've got to help these people first, and I'm sure we'll be able to work something out." The passenger was unimpressed. He asked loudly, so that the passengers behind him could hear, "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO I AM?"
Without hesitating, the attendant smiled and grabbed her public address microphone: May I have your attention please? May I have your attention please?" she began. With her voice being heard clearly throughout the terminal, she said, "We have a passenger here at Gate 14 WHO DOES NOT KNOW WHO HE IS. If anyone can help him find his identity, please come to Gate 14."
With the folks behind him in line laughing hysterically, the man glared at the attendant, gritted his teeth and said, "F*** You!" Without flinching, she smiled and said, "I'm sorry, sir, but you'll have to get in line for that too."

Kingfisher Onam Ad!

Hunting Down!!!

This is exciting!!!!!!!!!!!
A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?
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>The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, and even fix his car. As the man tries to fall > > asleep, he hears a strange sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, We can't tell you. You're not a monk.
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>The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some yea! rs later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery.
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>The monks gain accept him, feed him, and even fix his car.
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>That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier.
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>The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, We can't tell you. You're not a monk.
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>The man says, All right, all right. I'm dying to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was, is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?
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>The monks reply, You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.
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>The man sets about his task. Some forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.
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> The monks reply, Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.
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> The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, The sound is right behind that door.
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>Th! e man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, Real funny. May I have the key?
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>The monks give him the key, and he opens the door.
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>Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door.
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>The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald,....
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>.......silver, topaz, and amethyst.
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>Finally, the monks say, This is the last key to the last door.
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>The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound.
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>. . . . But I can't tell you what it is because you're not a monk.
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>DONT HUNT ME DOWN COS I'M STILL HUNTING THE PERSON WHO SENT ME THIS !! ;-)

Chanakya's Quotes

"A person should not be too honest. Straight trees are cut first and
Honest people are screwed first."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC 75 BC
)
***************************************************
" Even if a snake is not poisonous, it should pretend to be venomous."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC -275
BC)
***************************************************
"The biggest guru-mantra is: Never share your secrets with anybody. !
It will destroy you."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275 BC)
***************************************************
"There is some self-interest behind every friendship. There is no
Friendship without self-interests. This is a bitter truth."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC -275
BC)
***************************************************
"Before you start some work, always ask yourself three questions -
Why am I doing it, What the results might be and Will I be successful.
Only when you think deeply and find satisfactory answers to these
questions, go ahead."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275 BC)
***************************************************
"As soon as the fear approaches near, attack and destroy it."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275 BC)
***************************************************
"Once you start a working on something, don't be afraid of failure and
don't abandon it. People who work sincerely are the happiest."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275BC )
***************************************************
"The fragrance of flowers spreads only in the direction of the wind.
But the goodness of a person spreads in all direction."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275BC )
***************************************************
"Whore s don't live in company of poor men, citizens never support a
weak company and birds don't build nests on a tree that doesn't bear
fruits."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275BC )
***************************************************
"God is not present in idols. Your feelings are your god. The soul is
your temple."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275BC )
***************************************************
"A man is great by deeds, not by birth."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275BC
)
***************************************************
"Never make friends with people who are above or below you in status.
Such friendships will never give you any happiness."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275BC
)
***************************************************
"Treat your kid like a darling for the first five years. For the next
five years, scold them. By the time they turn sixteen, treat them like a
friend. Your grown up children are your best friends."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275BC )
***************************************************
"Books are as useful to a stupid person as a mirror is useful to a
blind person."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275BC )
***************************************************
"Education is the best friend. An educated person is respected
everywhere. Education beats the beauty and the youth."
Chanakya quotes (Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC-275BC
)
***************************************************

Sardar Jokes from India!

Enjoy...................
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> A Sardar, his wife with son and daugher went to a
> party.. he introduced his family to his friends saying.." I am Sardar..
and this is Sardarnee ...this is my kid and that is my kidney...!!"
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> American says "US mein shaadi E-mail se hoti hai.."
> Sardarji " India me to.. shaadi Fe-mail se hoti hai...!!!"
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> Q. What do you call a fat lady waiting for a bus?
> A. Moti-vating..!!!
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> Nurse - "Mubarak ho.. Sardarji.. aap papa ban gaye.."
> Sardarji - " Meri wife ko nahi bolna.. main use surprise doonga..!"
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> Dr Chopra psychotherapist wanted 'Sign board' to be painted in front of
his clinic but our Sardar painter painted "Dr Chopra Psycho The Rapist"
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Software Wars!